Over 250,000 people attended 311 films from 53 countries between September 10 and 19, making the Toronto International Film Festival the third largest such event in the world (how that statistic came about, I'm not sure, but that's what the local newspapers keep saying). Okay, so I only took in seven films... so sue me. There's only so much standing in line a girl can handle...

Life is Beautiful - The premiere, held at the lavish and ornate 1500-seat Elgin Theatre, included an introduction by writer, director and star Roberto Begnini, who exuberantly declared, "Most people throw flowers [into the crowd]. I would throw myself," bringing up images of an aging Italian crowd surfer. The film tells a tale about a man who helps his son survive a concentration camp by pretending it was all make-believe. My problem with it was that the premise wasn't plausible, and if you're going to have an implausible premise, choose a background other than than the Holocaust. However, I was one of perhaps only 20 people who did not participate in a standing ovation when the lights came up... Unfortunately, I was sitting right across the aisle from Mr. Begnini, and he stared directly at me, as if to ask, "What, you didn't like my movie?" No, I didn't. But it won the People's Choice Award, so what do I know...

Permanent Midnight - This time, festival officials introduced Jerry Stahl, on whose autobiography the film is based, and for a minute, I thought Ben Stiller was playing a joke and walking on stage. Except this guy was older and had clearly done massive drugs at one time. But we should all have such dopplegangers in Hollywood. Stiller was introduced (turns out he's shorter than Stahl), along with former ER beauty Maria Bello and Don't-Hate-Me-Because-I-Didn't-Leave-Hugh-Grant supermodel Elizabeth Hurley, who looked amazing (of course) in a Saran-wrap tight grey floor-length floral number. The film? I loved it, but apparently, heroin humor isn't for everyone. The sound of one voice laughing...

God Said Ha! - Former Saturday Night Live star Julia Sweeney was clearly thrilled to have a film in the Festival, and it's difficult not to like anyone that sincerely exuberant. While her one-woman story of her battle with cancer, which dovetailed her brother's, is compelling, her performance isn't. Which is too bad, because the content is inherently more interesting than anything Spalding Gray has ever come up with, but Sweeney seems uncomfortable in her body, only shining when she's taking on one of many characters. High point (other than the fact that she lives): there's only one "Pat" scene.

Dog Park - None of the cast were at the screening I attended, so you have to settle for a review. If you're single and/or feeling bitter about relationships, this is the film for you. Written and directed by former Kid in the Hall Bruce McCulloch, this very cynical comedy follows a recently-single man (Luke Wilson, Home Fries, who looks like Tom Cruise after serious wisdom tooth surgery) and his friendship with The Perfect Couple (McCulloch and the ever-fabulous Janeane Garofalo)... oh, and everybody's relationships with their canines, including a doggie-shrink, played by fellow former Kid Mark McKinney.

Happiness - Todd Solondz is a sick, sick man. In Happiness, he manages to tell a story about a pedophile psychologist, a murderer, and a compulsive obscene phone caller... and make it touching, funny and skin-crawling, all at the same time. He told the Toronto Star that he wanted "to put on film certain characters that might be normally deemed repugnant or freakish, and to somehow whittle away at those surfaces, so that the audience could sympathize with the unsympathetic and see that there was a richness of life there." To the premiere audience, he admitted that he could identify with each of the characters, which is a pretty scary thought. Universal's October Films dropped Happiness faster than you can say NC-17, which has only added to its indie cred. Although the film will leave you feeling nauseous and wanting a shower, it works, in large part due to exceptional performances by Dylan Baker, Jared Harris, Joan Allen and recent Emmy winner Camryn Manheim. A side thought: the nerdy, bespectacled, scrunch-faced Welcome to the Dollhouse director bears an uncanny resemblance to the little girl in that film.

Clay Pigeons - I thought it was going to be a comedy. Oops. The cast apparently sat in the row right behind me, but they came in after the film began and left before the lights came up, so I can't tell you anything other than "tall, short, short, tall, medium, very heavy [must be crew member], tall." Janeane Garofalo can do no wrong in my book, and Vince Vaughn has an incredibly creepy laugh.

The Imposters - Several years ago (1990, to be exact), I worked on Moliere's Scapin at Yale Repertory Theatre. The star was a guy named Stanley Tucci whose biggest credit, at that point, was some guest spots on Wiseguy. I was -- professionally speaking -- in love. He was, and is, the best physical comedian I've ever seen, and finally, with The Imposters, the rest of the world gets to see his talents (Big Night was wonderful, but in a different way). Several bits from The Imposters actually grew out of Scapin, including the soon-to-be-classic "blind" scene, so I sat through most of the screening feeling nostalgiac. After the film, Tucci told the audience that it was the casting director who came up with the idea to cast Woody Allen as a director whose marriage is in shambles. When asked if it was difficult to get the reclusive director to accept the part, Tucci quipped, "Not at all. It was much more difficult to get Steve [Buscemi]," referring to his longtime friend and co-star, who was standing next to the Tucci on stage. ("It interfered with Armageddon," Buscemi retorted). Steve Buscemi revealed that he'd thought filming a farce would be a blast -- until the first scene he filmed required him to be suicidal, with a gun to his head.

Don't forget to check out Cranky's page for full reviews!

-- Sarah Chauncey