Trent's Review
An apt title, to be sure. This movie is a Loser in every sense of the word.

American Pie's Jason Biggs plays a really nice kid from the sticks who wins a scholarship to New York University. Once there, he rooms with three of the most unlikable, barely-even-human roommates who force him out of the dorm room with techniques that rival the ATF's Waco tactics for obscene cruelty. Having to move into a spare room at an animal shelter is the least of his problems, especially considering the fact that his teachers are all jerks, nobody likes him, and his love for death-rocker classmate Mena Suvari (American Beauty AND American Pie) goes unrequited. Eventually the "loser," after having been shat upon by every human and institution in sight, gets feeble revenge and wins the girl back (well, he wins her back by default - the self-obsessed and abusive professor she's been shacking up with practically kicks her out). We are to assume that he lives happily ever after.

This film, written and directed by tried-and-true "teen film phenomena" Amy Heckerling (Clueless, Fast Times at Ridgemont High), is one of the most pointless and undeveloped films I've seen in quite some time. It feels like Ms. Heckerling stopped writing the film about halfway through the first draft and just started filming - "Hey, no script? No problem. We'll just get the kids from American Pie and, y'know, they'll fall in love and, uh . . . and we'll put a pointless scene with a non-threatening-but-punky band that the kids like . . . The kids still like Everclear, right?"

Loser suffers from a fundamental lack of identity. While "the kids" these days like gross out comedy, it's not to be mistaken for just-plain-mean-for-no-reason comedy. A flippant sub-plot involving the "date rape" drug Rohypnol is pretty tasteless considering the tone of the rest of the film. And if you're going to make a movie called Loser, you should make the protagonist an actual loser, not a sympathetic character afloat in an ocean of ludicrously cruel supporting characters.

The advance screening audience that I watched Loser with sat stony and silent throughout the entire film. There were one or two polite chuckles, but no overwhelmingly funny moments - not a good sign for a film that purports to be a comedy. Nor was there an overwhelming sense of "aaaaaawwwww . . . isn't that sweet?" when the ill-fated couple finally get together - not a good sign for a film that seems to think it's a romantic comedy.

Given the audience reaction, Loser's title will be prophetic when we see this weekend's box office results.

-- Trent Haaga

Trent's Rating: 1 out of 5

Scott's Review
The title pretty much says it all about this latest teen summer flick. You shouldn't even waste your money on this one and definitely don't waste your time reading this review. Unfortunately, I not only had to sit through this piece of garbage, but also now have to destroy valuable brain cells writing my opinion of it. Amy Heckerling's latest adolescent event pic is just horrendous. I can honestly say that this is one of the worst films I have ever seen. Now, I'm a sucker for this genre. I enjoyed both Fast Times and Clueless and even have Varsity Blues, Outside Providence and American Pie on DVD. Loser makes these films look like Gone With the Wind. It is offensive to teens that a studio would release this fodder. I can just see the Sony execs (who bear in mind are all crusty intellects far removed from even their 20's), "Well let's see, we need a summer teenager movie. Why don't we take two people from American Pie and team them up with Amy Heckerling? It will be great!! We'll call it Fast Times at Clueless Pie!!" But guess what they forgot along the way … A SCRIPT!!! Don't they realize that young people are incredibly smart? You can't throw any piece of trash at them and expect them to pay $8.50 to see it.

For those of you who are still reading, here's the plot. When Paul (Jason Biggs) leaves Minnesota to attend college in the Big Apple, he is filled with fear of the unknown. Will he be good enough? Will he be funny enough? Will he make friends? After not getting along with his roommates, he moves into the local animal hospital where he receives a room in return for helping out around the clinic. Soon he meets Dora (Mena Suvari) who is having a secret affair with her professor (Greg Kinnear). Paul falls in love with Dora who, blinded by her schoolgirl crush, doesn't notice his affection. They soon become friends and after seeing the light, Dora falls for Paul and they live happily ever after. This story is not only completely unoriginal but also boring and painfully unfunny. When word of mouth starts spreading on this dud, mark my words, it will absolutely bomb.

-- Scott Wolfgang

Scott's Rating: 1 out of 5

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